Since I have used this Bible passage as an example of how the Lord God has positively influenced my overeating, this doesn't necessarily reflect the whole meaning of the verse. Debbie

COE Support Note:

If you REALLY want to read how Christ helped me throughout this weight loss and even when I was tempted, you should read some of the 100's of previous posts on https://christianovereaterssupport.blogspot.com/

Letting Relationships Define Me…

Ephesians 5:32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband.

Although I’m married to a wonderful person, there was a time when I dated some who didn’t respect me. I went through times in my life, that I thought I wasn't whole if I wasn't in a relationship. I let having a relationship define me. It said that I was someone worth loving…or did it?

If I’m with someone who treats me in ways that make me feel terrible about myself, does that relationship still define me? Does it say that I am worthy of being blamed for all the person’s mistakes? Does it say that I deserve to be treated rudely? Does it say that I deserved to have my feelings hurt? Does it say that I should be put-down to the point that I don’t know who I am anymore?

There have been so many times through those years, where I felt worthless and consoled myself through food. When I got heavier and heavier, I felt I deserved it for not being able to make the other person happy. Was my having a relationship defining me, saying I was someone worth loving or was it saying that I didn’t love myself enough to be in a healthy relationship or none at all?

I can’t speak for anyone else, but God showed me what was right for me. I found that no relationship was better than one that makes me feel terrible about myself. No relationship was worth enduring constant put-downs and rude remarks. No relationship was worth feeling so worthless that I felt I deserved to be fat, because I felt like such a terrible person who deserved this treatment.

It took some time of turning my insecurities and my food over to God’s very capable hands, before I could heal. I am fortunate that God showed me that I shouldn't just run back into another relationship. I needed to heal and feel deserving of a healthy relationship, before I could have a relationship with someone else. I had to feel deserving of respect, and I needed to learn to love and respect myself, before I could be open to a healthy relationship where my husband respected me. Ephesians 5:32 This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church. 33 Nevertheless let every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself; and the wife see that she reverence her husband. 

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