Wait for the Lord; be strong and take heart and wait for the Lord. Psalm 27:14 NIV Bible
It seems that before the Lord God performed the miracle in my life that allowed an 80+ pound weight loss, and for the vast majority of it to stay off for over 30 years, I was always waiting for one thing or another. I think I was mainly waiting until I felt better about myself.
I was waiting to when I was thinner. Then, I would feel better about myself. I was waiting for people who appreciated me for who I am. Then, I would feel better about myself. I was waiting until I was a smaller size, so I could wear more fashionable clothes, instead of the stretch pants that had the elastic completely stretched out, because I was horrified to buy the next larger size. If I was thinner and had those more fashionable clothes, and people who appreciated me, then, I would feel better about myself. The list of things I was waiting for, is much longer than this, but I wouldn't have time to tell you what was really worth waiting for, if I make an extensive list of things.
After, the Lord God allowed that miraculous weight loss, I didn't initially feel better about myself. Sure, I could wear more fashionable clothes, and some people respected me and my opinion more, but there was still something lacking in those initial goals. It's what Christ showed me along the way, through the weight loss process. He showed me that when I was worried, stressed, over tired, insecure, happy, or sad, I turned to food to comfort me. I had made food a false god, because I turned to it for comfort, instead of turning these issues over into the very capable hands of my Lord and Savior. Once, I started to do this, I started feeling better about myself, long before I lost all the weight, before I got more fashionable clothes, or had people who appreciated me for who I am. For the Lord God loved me just as I am, fat or thin, flaws and all. Once I realized this and stopped turning to food to comfort me and turned to Christ, those other things didn't matter any more, and Christ gave me the comfort I longed for!
