The Lord said to Moses, "I have heard the grumbling of the Israelites. Tell them, 'At twilight you will eat meat, and in the morning you will be filled with bread. Then, you will know that I Am the Lord your God.' Exodus 16:11-12 NIV Bible
Yesterday, when we went for lunch with friends, I could smell either pancakes or waffles. It made me think of the waffles that I love with lots of pecans on them, so I planned on making waffles for dinner tonight. My mother used to make breakfast for dinner when I was a kid and it was always a special treat!
I planned to put the chopped almonds on top of my husband's waffles, because I can no longer eat them. It seems that I choke more when I eat almonds, which is a shame, because I really like them. I was going to make the waffle for me with pecans, one of my favorites! When my husband wanted pecan waffles, too, instead of one with chopped almonds, I got very defensive. I didn't want to share the pecans that I had stashed away for myself.
If you are reading between the lines, you'll realize that I was exhibiting some high-risk compulsive overeating behaviors. I had stashed those pecans aside just for me and I wasn't willing to share them. I even got very frustrated with him for even mentioning that he wanted pecans on his waffles, which is a normal thing for anyone to want. After trying to turn my struggling feelings over to the Lord God, I realized I was making food a false god again, and turning to food, instead of to the Lord, something I thought I no longer did. Obviously, I was wrong, but when I finally realized how I over-reacted to my husband's wanting a pecan waffle, I continued to try to put this in the Lord's hands. Eventually, He pushed through my foggy thinking and showed me what I was doing. I couldn't believe that I was doing this again after all these years! I thought I was past this! Fortunately, Jesus showed me the error of my ways, so I prayerfully decided to give my stash of pecans to my husband. Why keep something that's going to tempt me and lead me in to old, unhealthy patterns.
