Needing a Money-Back Guarantee First

But when the men who had gone up with [Caleb] said, "We can't attack those people, they are stronger than we are." Numbers 13:31 NIV Bible

This paraphrased passage is when Moses sent twelve Israelites, one from each of the twelve tribes, over into the Promised Land, at the Lord God's command. This is because the people were hesitant to go over into it without having someone check it out first. They wanted a Money-Back Guarantee first, before venturing over. Ten of the twelve Israelites came back and said we can't go over there, they are tall like giants, and much too strong for us. The people got frightened and vowed not to go over into the Promised Land, which bought about lots of consequences with it. With refusing to take the risks to go to the Promised Land of milk and honey, that Lord had especially prepared for them, they spent forty years in the wilderness, for being a stubborn stiff-necked people unwilling to trust the Lord God.  

Sometimes, I feel like these stubborn, stiff-necked people. I have been reluctant to move forward on things that the Lord God has on my heart, and I want a Money-Back Guarantee first, before doing so! You would think that after the Lord allowed an 80 pound weight loss, and the vast majority of it staying off for over 30 years, I wouldn't have any doubts about anything the Lord asks me to do. I am embarrassed to say that isn't usually the case.

If the Lord leads me to share my faith with others, He has a definite plan and I shouldn't be so hesitant! Fortunately for me, the Lord God brings me back and refocuses me when I'm reluctant to do His will. This has happened so many times, and the Lord is refocusing me, I am humbled that I've done it, yet again. Why do I feel like I need a Money-Back Guarantee first, before taking risks? 

How Can I, Lord?

"Pardon me, my Lord," Gideon replied, "but how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family?" Judges 6:15 NIV Bible

The back story of this is that the Lord asked Gideon to lead some of the Israelites into battle against the Middianites, but Gideon asks the Lord, "How can I do it?" Well, sometimes in my life, I end up saying the same things to the Lord, through what I say, but often by what I fail to do that He's requested of me.

I realize that there was a time in my life where I responded with disbelief when the Lord had it on my heart to do things for Him, because I didn't quite understand how He works in my life. That's like Gideon, who didn't know the Lord would have him return of thousands of Israelites, so that the Lord God would have Gideon win the battle with only 300 men. The Lord did this, so the Israelites would know that the battle was won through the Lord God, and not by the Israelite's powerful, large army. Well, the Lord does things like that in my life, as well.

The thing is, once I realized how powerful the Lord is, why do I keep asking Him, "How can I do this, Lord?" I should know better by now. He's allowed a miraculous weight loss of 80 pounds and for the vast majority of it to stay off for over 30 years. He has healed my sagging self-esteem & He refocuses me when I start slip sliding down a slippery slope of old habits and poor choices. He's had it on my heart to write different blogs for Him, to show others some of the many ways He has worked in my life. But most times, my reply is, "How can I, Lord?" Sure I have these insignificant reasons for thinking I shouldn't do something, but fortunately for me, Jesus didn't say when it came to giving His life on the cross for our sins, "How can I, Lord?" I have lots to be prayerful about!

Gaining the Weight Back Would Just be Small Potatoes

 As for everyone who comes to Me and hears My words and puts them into practice, I will show you what they are like. Luke 6:47 NIV Bible

Although this verse doesn't fully explain it, Jesus goes on to tell about the man who dug down into the rock and laid a firm foundation and it wasn't moved when the floods and torrents came, because it was well built [paraphrased].  I want to have that same firm foundation in the Lord, and not just because I don't want to gain all the weight back that He allowed me to loose.

Sure, I don't want to gain the weight back, but that is just be "Small Potatoes," to what I would have lost by not having a firm foundation in Jesus Christ, our Lord. He has blessed me in sooooo many other ways that are far more significant than the weight loss. Things that come to mind are: my sagging self-esteem that the Lord God healed, and left me with a positive self-concept, not just because of the loss of weight. Actually, I didn't have a good self-concept when I lost the 80+ pounds that the Lord allowed. I'm saying that He healed my self-esteem that was sagging, I thought because of all the excess weight I carried, but it was had more to do about how I felt about myself, as a person, than my size.

Also, the Lord makes me be a better person. It's not that I'm a better person, because I lost weight. It's the firm foundation in Him, that He tugs at my conscience when I'm being tempted to be judgmental, impatient, rude, hateful, spiteful.... and the list could go on. He shows me through His example for us, that I am to be much more tolerant, forgiving, kind, and generous! The weight loss He allowed may have been icing on the cake, but they are just "Small Potatoes" compared with all He's shown me and continues to show me within my life.

Then Your Heart Will Become Proud

 Then your heart will become proud and you will forget the Lord your God, who brought you out of Egypt, out of the land of slavery. Deuteronomy 8:14 NIV Bible

You wouldn't think this relates to me, because I've never been to Egypt, but it still relates to me! It used to be that I was a slave to food and the desire to be thin. It controlled my life, and I let it become a false god to me. Although I didn't realize it, I turned to food for comfort in times of stress or times of joy,  instead of turning these over into the hands of my Lord and Savior, for comfort.

Once I started turning to the Lord, instead of to food, the weight started coming off, but not by a specific thing I did. I just started putting my food, my stress, and my eating into the Lord's very capable hands each and every day and every time I ate anything. 

He allowed the loss of over 80 pounds and has allowed the vast majority of it to stay off for over 30 years. I was worried when I lost the weight, that my heart would become proud and I would get big-headed and take the credit for the Lord leading me out of the land of slavery to food. Fortunately, anytime I start backsliding, He very graciously helps me refocus, on Him as my Savior, who saved me from myself!

Man Doesn't Live on Bread Alone

The [Lord] humbled you, causing you to hunger, and then feeding you with manna, which neither you nor your ancestors have known, to teach you that man doesn't live on bread alone, but on every word that comes from the mouth of the Lord. Deuteronomy 8:3 NIV Bible

This particular passage really makes me ponder the portion about "Man Doesn't Live on Bread Alone." So many, many years, it seems the main part of my day was focused on what I was going to eat, what I couldn't eat, and what I was planning ahead to eat. Although my faith in God was important to me, it didn't play much of a role in this portion of my life, other than than to ask God to please, "Help me loose the 80+ pounds of extra weight."

At a particular spot in my life, the Lord God showed me that I had "Control Issues!" This carried through to my eating and my relationship with my Lord. Over time, He showed me that food and my obsession with eating and the hope of being thin, had become a false god to me. I was turning to food to comfort me in times of stress or joy, instead of turning to the Lord God, and putting these into Christ's very capable hands. 

Once I started turning to Christ instead of food for comfort, my weight started coming off, but not by something I did or 'willed' to happen! The Lord God allowed the weight loss of 80+ pounds and has blessed me by having the vast majority of that weight stay off for over 30 years. At times I've prayerfully contemplated this, in that I prayed for many years prior to this for the Lord to please, "Help me loose the 80+ pounds  of extra weight.] The response the Lord had on my heart was all those years, I wanted to be in control. I wanted God to help me loose it. It wasn't until the point, that I put it all into Christ's very capable hands, that it happened, instead of asking God to help Me do it! He can do it for you, as well, if you turn it into Christ's very capable hands!